Sarah Hamaker

Jared turned on the hot water and added dish soap to the sponge. He attacked the griddle with more force than necessary. Soapy water splashed up, soaking the bottom of his shirt. Great, now he had a wet shirt. He didn’t want to think about why Mary’s abrupt departure irked him. He rolled his shoulders and finished the dishes at a more sedate pace. He was drying his hands on the kitchen towel when his cell phone buzzed on the counter. He leaned over and saw it was Will.

“Hello?”

“I need to see you.”

Jared leaned against the counter. “Hello to you, too. What’s up?”

“Sorry, I haven’t slept much over the past few days. I think we’ve caught a break in the case. But it’s not something I can discuss on the phone.”

“I’m going out on a limb for you with what I’ve agreed to already. This isn’t—”

“No, it’s nothing like the last time.”

Jared heard the apology in his voice. He had been friends with Will since Jared started his residency at an inner city clinic. If Will thought Jared would forget that it was Will who had roped him into the previous case, he was mistaken. On the other hand, Will’s hunches usually turned out to be right, and if Jared had listened to Will’s advice on the last case, a bullet might not have ended up in his leg.

Jared lowered his head and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Okay. I’m without wheels, so you’ll have to come to me.”

“Thanks. Are you free tonight?”

“I’m free every night. I’m out in Culpepper.”

“Culpepper? Give me the address and I’ll enter it into my phone’s GPS for directions.”

Jared rattled off the address.

“I’ll be there around seven-thirty.”

“It’s the carriage house at the back of the property. Just keep going down the driveway and it’ll dead end at the house. The apartment’s above it with the stairs on the right hand side.”

“Okay, got it. See you then.”

Jared hung up the phone. “I hope I don’t regret this,” he said aloud to the empty kitchen.

# # #

Mary flexed her fingers. She had managed to make it to the chat only two minutes late, but in cyberspace time, that might as well have been two hours.

David: Glad you’re here now. I might have to scoot out early today because I have an important meeting w/ my pastor to discuss support for my missionary work in Peru.
Mary: So soon? I thought you had training to do first.
David: The organization I’m going with wants me to get started right away on the fundraising so there’s no delay between the end of training and going to the mission field.
Mary: That sounds like a lot of work. Do you have help?
David: Sort of. I get some advice from the group but I have to do all the legwork. The monthly pledges will be the hardest I think.
Mary: How much do you need to raise again?
David: At least $30K before going & $2K in monthly pledges.
Mary: Yikes.
David: Yikes is right. It’s going to be tough, as I doubt I’ll be any good at fundraising. I wish there was someone who could help me, but God has called me to Peru & I know He’ll help me make it there.

Mary deflated against the back of her chair. She really liked David but the thought of him going to Peru twisted her stomach. David had come across as nothing like her parents, but she couldn’t separate the two in reality. If she didn’t offer to help David when he really needed it, he would find someone else who supported his calling fully. She tapped her fingers against the smooth wood of the desktop. Her easy conversation with Jared gave her courage to go out on a limb. If she could feel at ease in his company, then she could help someone she had grown to respect. She would take the plunge and see where it led her.

Mary: Is there anything I could do too help you?

She clicked send before she chickened out. David’s reply popped up before she had even moved her hands from her keyboard.

David: Mary, you are the most amazing woman. That u would offer to help someone you’ve never even met face-to-face with raising support shows your kind & gentle spirit. You are truly a woman of God. I would be honored if u would help me.
Mary: Truth be told, I’m terrified. This is definitely out of my comfort zone.
David: I’ll be w/you every step of the way. We can do this together.
Mary: U lead, I’ll follow. J
David: Let me talk w/ Bringing Christ to Latin America, the organization I’ll be w/ as a missionary, & see what they recommend. I’m sitting here typing w/ tears of gratitude for your offer. I was feeling a bit down, thinking of all the work I had to do b4 leaving for Peru, but you have lightened my load. Now I’m smiling like an idiot. JJJJ I’m glad I’ll have you by my cyberside helping me.

Mary thought his words were overly sweet, but she basked in the expressed sentiment nonetheless.

Mary: I’m happy to help in any way. Just let me know what I can do.
David: I will, sweet, sweet Mary. Now I must run to my meeting. OOO, and, dare I write it?, XX, with the fondest of hearts.

Mary sat for a long time staring at those words, her heart filled to bursting with joy before deflating at the realization that this man was heading to another country soon. Her cell phone chirped, interrupting her thoughts.

Distracted by thoughts of David, she picked it up and answered without checking caller ID.

“Mary? It’s Jared.”

“What’s up?” She twirled a strand of hair around her finger.

“I just wanted to let you know I will be having a visitor tonight around seven-thirty. He’ll drive straight back to the carriage house, so you shouldn’t be bothered. But I thought you would like to know.”

Mary’s eyes strayed to the chat transcript still glowing on her computer screen. She reread David’s last chat entry again and again, barely registering Jared’s words.

“Are you still there? Hello?”

Mary blinked. “Sorry, Jared. I was distracted.”

“That was all I wanted to say. Bye.”

Mary shut her phone, her eyes never leaving the words David had written. No matter what happened, she had received her first cyber-kiss. She sighed, knowing that might be the only type of kiss a man would ever give her.

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. Phantom Love is copyrighted and cannot be used in any form without permission from Sarah Hamaker.

Mary groaned when her alarm clock woke her at three in the afternoon. She automatically hit the snooze button to silence the shrieking. She had tumbled into bed without brushing her teeth or washing her face at nine-thirty that morning after making sure Jared was sleeping comfortably.

The alarm clock buzzed again, and she fought the urge to roll over and go back to sleep. Her stomach growled, reminding her she needed sustenance more than sleep at this point. She forced herself out of bed and walked into the bathroom to take a hot shower. When she caught her reflection in the mirror, she gasped. A purple, fist-sized bruise grew where Jared’s punch met her jaw. Good thing she worked from home. No one would believe how she acquired a bruise like that.

The hot water eased her achy muscles. As she shampooed her hair, she hoped whatever Jared had wasn’t catching. She had never called in sick to work in the seven years she had been a DJ, and she didn’t intend to start.

When she was finished, Mary descended the staircase feeling much better except for the ache in her jaw. She hoped the ibuprofen she took would kick in quickly. She rounded the corner of the kitchen to hear Elvis crooning about burning love. Jared stood at the counter, expertly flipping pancakes on the electric griddle. His hair curled a bit at the nape of his neck, damp from his own shower. He was wearing a pair of well-worn jeans and a rugby shirt.

“You must be feeling better.” She leaned against the doorjamb as she watched him.

“Yes, I am.” Jared turned and grinned. “Breakfast for an afternoon snack?” He paused and studied her face. “Your face. I can’t believe I did that.”

She raised her eyebrows. “I can’t either.”

His face turned beet red. “I’m so sorry, Mary. I don’t know what I was thinking.”

“I know you didn’t mean it. You were having a nightmare.”

He turned back to the griddle and muttered under his breath, “I wish that nightmare would quit visiting me.”

She decided a change in subject would be best for both of them. “Smells good in here.”

Jared waved the spatula. “Woke up a while ago and checked my temperature. No fever. Must have overworked myself yesterday along with forgetting to take my allergy medicine. I feel fit as a fiddle now.”

“That’s amazing. I’ve never seen an adult recover from a fever so quickly.”

“My mother said I had the constitution of a horse, whatever that means. Except for the allergic reaction to cut grass, I’ve rarely been sick.”

“Not many people can say that. You’re lucky.”

Jared glanced down at his leg. “Maybe not so lucky, but please, sit down.”

Mary glanced at the kitchen table, which Jared had set for two with orange juice in petite glasses beside plates, forks, and napkins. He slid the last of the pancakes on a plate and carried it to the table.

“How did you know I would be coming down?”

“I heard you moving around and gambled that meant you were up and about. I figured cooking you breakfast was the least I could do.”

She sat down and breathed in the delicious aroma of hot pancakes. She couldn’t remember the last time someone had cooked her pancakes. Her mother never made them and Aunt Geraldine’s idea of breakfast was cold cereal every single day. As soon as she was old enough, she’d had to pour her own milk. She swallowed hard to dispel the lump in her throat. If she wasn’t careful, she would cry over the syrup.

Jared placed a plate of crisp bacon on the table and set a pot of tea beside it. “I’m not sure I made the tea right.”

Mary shook out her cloth napkin and placed it on her lap. “I’m sure it will be just fine.”

Over the meal, Jared steered the conversation to their shared childhood experiences. Mary suspected he did so deliberately to avoid talking about the nightmare or his leg injury, but she enjoyed remembering some of the happiest moments of her life. Jared had Mary in stitches laughing about some of their infamous escapades.

“I think my favorite was the time I dared picked the flowers from Mrs. Grant’s front garden.” He took a sip of juice.

“She caught you snipping her prized roses.”

“I don’t think I sat down for a week after my mother got through with me.”

Mary smiled. “It was the day before she hosted the garden club, so you can’t really blame her.”

Jared grinned back. “Mrs. Grant had the prettiest flowers on the block, and I wanted you to have them.”

“I only wish I could have enjoyed them, but your mom made you give the bouquet to Mars. Grant when you apologized.”

“You got even the next day, though.”

Mary groaned. “You had to bring that up. For the thousandth time, I didn’t realize you would come off the slide so fast!”

“What did you think would happen when you threw the egg on the metal slide when I was coming down?” Jared shook his fork at her.

“I don’t know. I thought it would be funny, I suppose.” She sobered as she recalled what came next. “But I had no idea you would fly off the slide and cut your head on the corner of the shed.”

Jared touched the scar on his forehead. “Don’t forget the tetanus shot because the shed was metal.”

Mary put her head in her hands. “I’m so sorry.”

“It all turned out for the good.” Jared put his fork down on his empty plate. “I was the coolest boy in third grade with my stitches.”

“I’m glad it wasn’t a total disaster.” Mary pushed her plate back. “I’ve eaten way too many pancakes.”

“I’m just glad you liked it. I’ve never cooked anything for a woman before.”

Mary burst out laughing again. “You’re such a tease, Jared.” She paused as his expression stayed sober. “Wait, you’re not kidding me? I would have thought someone like you would have had lots of girlfriends. In fact, I’m rather surprised you’re not married.”

Jared looked down at his plate. “I never had time for dating when I was younger, and when I did find someone, it didn’t work out.”

Mary could have kicked herself for dousing their jaunty mood with her careless words. The numerous times she had been the recipient of just such an exchange should have made her hold her tongue. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”

“No, it’s okay. I was going to say the same thing to you.” He offered a half smile that brought her back thirty years.

Now it was her turn to blush. “About the same as you, I suppose.” She suddenly felt the need to offer more of an explanation. Something about his eyes made her feel she could trust him. She took a deep breath. “People make me nervous, that’s why I don’t go out much. I was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder in college and…,” she shrugged as her words trailed off.

“You stay away from people as much as possible.”

She nodded. “That’s about the sum of it. Church is okay because I’ve been attending for years. I’ve been in therapy, which has given me some coping mechanisms for when I do go out.”

He leaned forward, his hands laced together. “So my being here doesn’t make you nervous or anxious?”

She shook her head. “No, that’s the odd part. Seeing you in the yard last week threw me off, but once I knew it was you, most of the anxiety left me.”

“That’s good news then.”

Mary’s watch beeped. She glanced down, shocked to see it read three-fifty. Only ten minutes until her chat with David. She looked up to see Jared watching her.

“Got someplace to be?” He rose and started stacking their plates.

She stood and grabbed their glasses. “Yes, I’m afraid I have to eat and run.”

“Hot date?”

Mary froze, her mouth dropping open. He couldn’t know about David, could he? She wasn’t ready to share David with anyone. She turned to look at Jared, who was rinsing their plates at the sink.

“No, nothing like that.”

She carried the glasses to the sink and avoided Jared’s eyes. Her watch alarm beeped again, signaling she had five minutes to go. She walked briskly to the doorway, half turning to say over her shoulder, “Thanks for breakfast, and I’m glad you’re feeling better.”

She walked around the corner and broke into a run for the stairs, taking the steps two at a time. She burst into her office and saw the wall clock read four-fifty-eight. She was going to be late to her chat with David and she didn’t like that.

# # #

David: Mary, where r u?

He touched the enter key and sat back in his chair, raising his arms over his head to stretch his muscles. He needed to hit the treadmill tonight. He had been spending too much time in front of the keyboard and not enough time exercising his body. If he wasn’t careful, he would turn into one of those couch potatoes with flabby arms and a beer gut. He grabbed the energy drink from the desktop and took a swig. Last night, he had stayed up too late chatting with some friends in India and he was paying the price today.

He glanced at the computer screen, but Mary’s icon stayed dark. She wasn’t one to miss their daily chats, and he worried that something might have happened to her. He hoped not, otherwise there went weeks of careful cultivation down the drain.

Mary: Sorry. Woke up late and was thrown off my whole routine.

David smiled and cracked his knuckles. Show time.

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. Phantom Love is copyrighted and cannot be used in any form without permission from Sarah Hamaker.

Jared heaved up from the bed, his right hand clenched and throbbing. The nightmare gradually left him, like a thunderstorm fading by degrees. It had been more than a week since he’d had the nightmare, and it had returned with more intensity than ever. He shook his head to clear the image and looked around the unfamiliar bedroom. Pale blue striped wallpaper. A four-poster bed. Teddy bears lining a shelf.

He pushed himself to a sitting position. Light from the window filtered into the room, but more brightness was needed to banish the vestiges of the nightmare. The bedside table held a small lamp and he reached over to switch on the lamp. Soft light flooded the room. As he straightened, he caught sight of the body lying on the floor by his bed.

His pulse, which had begun to return to normal, went warp speed. Not again. Not another body. He gazed down at the woman lying on her side, her black hair over her face, and saw her chest rise and fall. Not dead then. Alive. But what was she doing on the floor of his bedroom? Or was it her bedroom?

He pressed his fists into his eyes, which throbbed. Slowly, his thoughts slowed down enough for him to recall the day’s events. Picking up sticks. Mowing the grass. The painful itchy eyes. The trip to Mary’s house. Mary!

He tossed the covers back and swung his legs over the side of the bed, sliding down beside her as his injured leg gave out. He managed to avoid landing on her and sat beside her, brushing back her hair. At his touch, she stirred and opened her eyes.

“Jared?” She sat up, gingerly touching her jaw.

He nodded. “Where am I?”

“In the guest bedroom.”

She pushed her hair back and scooted against the bed.

“Why am I in your guest bedroom? Why are you on the floor?” He looked down at his bare legs. “And where are my jeans?”

Mary placed a hand on the side of her face. “You passed out in my kitchen with a high fever. I gave you some ibuprofen and put you into bed to sleep. And your jeans were filthy, so I tugged them off to wash.”

Jared peered closely at her. In the light of the lamp, her jaw appeared red. He blinked but the color stayed on her lower face. Then vestiges of his nightmare came back to him. “Did I hit you?”

She took a deep breath. “I was sleeping in the chair to keep an eye on you, making sure your fever didn’t spike. You were having a nightmare, I think. Shouting ‘no’ and thrashing about. I leaned over to wake you up and you socked me in the jaw.”

Jared opened his mouth but no sound came out. “Are you okay? You could have a concussion. Did you hit your head when you fell?”

“I’m fine. It’s only my jaw that hurts, not my head.”

“Let me see your eyes.” Jared leaned over and gazed into Mary’s eyes. He told himself not to be distracted by their purple hue as he looked at her pupils. No dilation. “Both look normal to me. Are you feeling nauseous?”

Mary shook her head.

“Any ringing in your ears or dizziness?”

“What are you, a doctor? No, no ringing or dizziness. I feel fine, honest. It’s you I’ve been worried about, but your fever seems better.”

“I do feel a little better.” He paused. “I’m so sorry I hit you, Mary. I was having a really bad dream…” He didn’t finish the sentence. He had no words to explain this particular nightmare.

Mary cocked her head. “It’s okay, Jared. Dreams can seem so real when we’re in them.” She lowered her eyes to the floor.

Jared wondered briefly what dreams Mary had, but her soft intake of breath focused his attention on what she was concerned about. He looked down and saw that his left thigh lay exposed, revealed in all its tangled and twisted glory. A quick glance toward the bed revealed the sheet too far away to cover his lower half.

“That looks like it must hurt a lot.”

“A bullet at close range will do that. Tore it up pretty good. Doctors said I might not walk again, but I proved them wrong.”

His leg had been stitched back together by a surgeon more concerned with making sure his ligaments and tendons worked than how pretty it looked when it was all over. Even with the warmer weather, he always wore long pants. He would sure miss swimming, unless he found a way to swim without his leg being on display.

“That’s a lot worse than falling out of a tree.”

Jared laughed at the shared memory of his spectacular descent from the old maple tree in his backyard.

“I still can’t believe you didn’t break something.”

“Me, either.” He closed his eyes. “I wasn’t so lucky this time, though. I thought my leg was on fire when the bullet hit it. I lost a lot of blood and passed out pretty quickly, so I don’t remember much until I woke up after surgery. The pain was manageable until physical therapy. Then things got intense.”

She was silent for a moment. “How long ago?”

He swallowed. “Seven months.” He cast about for a change in topic and saw the bruise darkening on her face. “You should probably ice that or it will swell a lot.”

“I will in a minute.” She scrambled to her feet. “We’d better get you back in bed.” She looked at her watch. “I took your temperature a little bit ago and you still have a low fever. Unless you’re hurting, more sleep will probably help you recover faster than more medicine.”

Jared grasped her out-stretched hand and allowed her to help him to his feet. The room spun briefly before righting itself. With an arm around his waist, she guided him into bed, averting her eyes as he swung his legs up and pulled up the covers.

“Let me get you some water. I’ll be right back,” she said over her shoulder as she left the room.

He tucked the covers under his chin and wondered how he had gotten himself into this mess. He didn’t allow himself to think about what he might have said during his nightmare. The nurses in the hospital had told him he shouted sometimes while asleep, but he wasn’t sure he wanted to ask Mary for details. He could only hope it wasn’t anything too revealing. He couldn’t afford to relive those memories anytime soon.

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. Phantom Love is copyrighted and cannot be used in any form without permission from Sarah Hamaker.